It’s coming to an end. But then, every ending is a new beginning. So I’m not sad. Nor am I happy. Am I indifferent? No, that’s not the right word either. Maybe something like content-but-confused-and-a-little-empty-but-at-the-same-time-incredibly-fulfilled-but-without-words-to-explain will do for now.
So, six months of travelling – I prefer calling it living on the move – is coming to its grande finale. Which is, waiting for my flight to take off. I’ve had wonderful reminders to reflect upon my highlights throughout this trip. Every month or so they’d be defined and put out there. Sometimes they were simple things like finding peanut butter in a remote Indian store called Namaste Chaos (made this up) or more sophisticated things like learning the art of trust. This post will attempt to identify the three highlights of my entire trip. I’m on a mission. Bear with me, it might take a while.
Thinking of going ‘home’ after all these weeks and months that seemed endless at the beginning, not sure. I don’t actually want to think about it. It’s like having to come back down on the dirty ground of reality with both feet barefoot. But I’m also a bit lost when I try to take everything in again, all of the six seemingly endless months. So much has happened that there is not space up there at the moment to process it. And it’s hard to put it in words. The memories, people, landscapes. The food, the trains, the lost shoes. The impressions, inspirations and thoughts. Reflections. Change. A lot of it.
Three completely different countries. Well, same same but different as my new friends the Indians would say. Because yes, in the end, aren’t we all very similar? What I found most apparent between the people here and my perception of the people in the West – including me – is how we want so much. And more. We’re ambitious, not that that’s bad, but it makes us forget to live in the now. We’re also attached to material temporary happiness and pleasure. Too much. Pleasure and joy is a good thing, it’s part of life on this Earth, but we don’t consume it wisely. We don’t understand it. Truly deeply. I know this sounds like an overgeneralisation, but I’ve been in these countries long enough by now to feel and see the difference. It may be subtle. There is people of both mindsets in both parts of the world, I’m sure of that too. But this is just one of my take aways and I’m sharing it here with you. So my biggest lesson is still upon me. It will be to integrate what I’ve learnt here and through my reflections into that world of Western reality. Which brings me back to thinking about going ‘home’. I am beyond myself with excitement to see the people that I love. And that’s probably the only reason why I’m going back for a while. A good enough reason. The best reason ever, it brings me so much happiness just thinking about it. And frankly, I never thought this feeling would ever come back. That feeling of home. Home for me is where the people are that I love. You all know who you are. But it doesn’t necessarily mean that it has to be a permanent physical location. Because that thought is like a rope around my neck slowly tightening and suffocating me. And I don’t think that’s because of the actual fact of being in one place, settling in one place. But the mere fact of deciding where that place is to be. So I do what I always do. Trust and enjoy the ride. Because at least for now the universe has wonderful things lined up for me.
Ok highlights. I’m procrastinating, aren’t I. It’s just a bit difficult you guys.
Can it be that everything is one big fat massive highlight? Of my life? Not accepted? Ok. Try again.
One of the highlights would probably be this last month that I spent in a remote village in the Himalayas. With all its Tibetan influence is has so much character and beauty. And then there are the hundreds of tiny ancient Buddhist monasteries scattered in the valley and high up on the mountains. These people have left an imprint on my consciousness. Not just the monks but the local people too. You cannot imagine the kindness. The generosity when they don’t have much. The joy of sharing, inspiring and accepting. It touches you somewhere deep inside. And it plants a seed. A wonderful plant of all this is now growing inside my heart and is making me want to water it and care for it. Or to be more literal, I want to continue studying, practicing and understanding this way of life and the philosophies of Buddhism. And don’t get me started on the cute kids calling out ‘Namaste’ and meeting their hands in prayer as they do. Now that’s some manners! It melts your heart. #highlightno1check
I had been toying with buddhist philosophies before. Read a book here and there or researched online. But it’s not until I was faced with that light in their eyes that I understood the beauty of it. And for me this isn’t about religion, it’s about understanding the mind. It’s like science almost. A way of life by which I can learn to be a master of my mind and through that live this life more consciously, more present and most of all, calm as a leaf floating in a himalayan lake.
On to the next one. Well, can this be a combination of aaaaalll the incredible, wonderful, beautiful and wise people I met and will forever keep in my heart? When travelling alone, one of the best learnings is to connect with people. Kick your butt and put yourself out there. For the people that know me well, this isn’t something that comes easy and naturally for me. Well, didn’t, I must say. It’s changed. I’m a degree more out there haha. And the connections that you make when travelling are something for life. They are part of your journey. Of your memories. They even influenced where I’d go next. Like little road signs. And there is nothing more beautiful than speaking with someone and realising how you are not alone in this world. How you’re not alone with certain opinions or your way of life. And it gives you comfort. And hope. Thank you, beautiful souls, for being part of my journey!
Ok, third. Nepali Dal Bhat. Haha! This is serious, listen up. Everywhere you go in this country when you order Dal Bhat it’s always ALL YOU CAN EAT. It’s like the National Unlimited Feast of rice, dahl, curried veg, some form of yummy spinach, different kinds of pickles and other sauces, papad aaaaand curd. Boom. Don’t ask about my extra kilos, it’s too good.
Ha. Got ya. I won’t count this as number three because it’s a no brainer and not fair for you. Because it might make you want to quit your job, say goodbye to your flatmates and buy a one-way ticket to Nepal just to taste it.
But it’s seriously good.
Ummh I just realised I only have one space left on the winner’s podium. I think this is turning into mission impossible. Ha. I’ll just continue and we’ll count the number of highlights at the end.
A highlight definitely worth mentioning is how my perception of India changed so drastically after just two days of arriving in the country. Thanks to caring advice of many people I was shitting myself when I walked out of Delhi’s airport at 11pm on the night of my arrival. Horror stories prepared and neatly folded in my head, bumbag clutched tighly and eyes never looking into other eyes I set off with my massive luggage to find my taxi driver in the mayhem of signs and faces. I did, of course, not at all find my pre-arranged taxi driver. Anyways, that’s an entirely different story. The point is, I was so scared thanks to everyone saying how dangerous it is to travel in India on your own that it was probably written on my forehead. And two days into being there a little fairy came along to clean my forehead and put some magic dust in my eyes and my world turned 180 degrees. I felt very safe and comfortable most of the time after that and I was so happy for myself and India. Because how else could I have fallen in love with this country? So, to anyone wanting to do the same. Listen to your loved ones, because they care about you. But don’t judge or form any sort of image in your head. Instead experience it for yourself if that’s what’s calling you. In fact, do this with everything. That’s the lesson I learnt through this. Don’t take anything said or written for what it seems. Listen and welcome it. Experience it. Understand it. Then build your own opinion.
Highlights, highlights..
Bali. It makes the list, no question. And it wasn’t just the magic of the place itself. But everything that I experienced there. Again, the people that I met. Starting off travelling with my teacher training was one of the best things that’s happened to me. It was such a wonderful way of easing into my new life. I learnt so so much thanks to the most wonderful teachers and fellow yogi sisters and brothers. And I can call myself a yoga teacher now. I can share my knowledge and inspire people. And the course took my own practice to a different level completely for which I’m grateful for. That’s also where I kickstarted my reflections. My journalling. And wow, the effect! The insights! The relief! The rest of Bali went by in the blink of an eye, but the memory is so vivid, so beautiful. It’s a place I will go back to whenever possible. The mix between local culture, devotion to their religion and the Western influence is very balanced and it makes it such an easy, pleasant, paradise place to forget yourself.
Technically, I could continue forever with these highlights, but that would be missing the purpose of the top three highlights. I think that mission failed anyways. Haha. I’m not even sure this is what I want to consider the top highlights. I’m revising parts already in my mind. But hey, this is a great thing! It means, I had an amazing adventure and there was nothing that wouldn’t make the highlights. Except for the odd MASSIVE spider. Or the lack of broccoli. Or losing my shoes. Although that’s not so bad at all.